My Home Is Possessed

I've spent much of the week trying to find the source of a beeping sound in the house. Doesn't matter what room you're in, it sounds like in it's in another one. Originally it beeped a couple times a day, but by today it was up to every ten minutes. I thought it might be the smoke alarm, but I changed the battery in it and that had no effect. Still beeping. Today I tried, for the heck of it, installing a new battery backup on the computer. The old one wasn't beeping...not when I was near it...but there hasn't been a beep since then. Fingers crossed.

Because now I have a new, much more annoying problem. The TV's volume has a 50 point scale. Usually we have it between 20 and 30, depending on the show, etc. Well, tonight the volume started going up, rapidly, by itself. No one anywhere near the TV or the remote, sometimes it jumped to 35, sometimes 50, sometimes...100. Besides being really loud, we don't know how it managed to go to double what we thought it could do. Also, to drop it back to normal, I have to press the button once per number. 70 times is a lot. This started during the football game and by the time OUAT came on, it was doing it every minute. I took the batteries out of the remote, but that didn't help. I think the TV is possessed.